Ethical Code For Robots

"South Korea's obsession with technology has led it to consider what may be the first government-backed ethical code for robots. Already well advanced in considering potential uses for robots, from the battlefield to the kitchen, the Korean ministry of commerce, industry and energy today said it hoped to publish guidelines for human-robot relations by the end of the year."
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/main.jhtml?xml=/news/2007/03/07/wkorea107.xml


My guidelines for human-robot relations

A human may impersonate a robot (perhaps by doing some wonky robot-style movments and making bleeping sounds) but a robot must never impersonate a human, especially if this impersonation involves wearing a dress & a wig, and hanging round in bars

A robot may throw a chocolate bar into a swimming pool so that people think its a turd and all panic themselves (perhaps even contributing a real turd in the process)

If asked, a robot must crouch down behind a human so that annother human can push him/her over

A robot must not protest if it gets blameed for someone else's farts

A robot is allowed to laugh when a female enters a building from the rain and says "I'm so wet"

A robot must never refuse to date a human because it "just wants to be friends" and/or because it doesn't want to get involved with someone it works with

A robot may injure a human if the said human has quite a whiny annoying voice and insists on telling the robot, at length, all about it's most recent boyfriend/holiday/pet/new place/the kinky sex they had last night

A robot may injure a human if it's internet connection suddenly fucks up for no reason. The human does not have to be to blame at all, just in close proximity

A robot may injure a human if in any argument the human claims that the robot is just moody "because it's that time of the month"

A robot is allowed to disregard human orders if said human looks like a megalomanic, or is stroking a cat, has a glass eye, wears one leather glove, has an evil laugh, has control issues, looks like Mr Burns, is wearing a military unform despite never having been in the military, or/and is a bit "shouty"

A robot must obey any dare issued by a drunk human

A robot must not drink-'n'-dial

A robot must never pretend to be totally over its ex, when it plainly isn't.

A robot must never tell "your mum" jokes

A human must never mock a robot's rust or lack of discernable genatalia

A robot must never refuse a request for it to use it's lasers, even if it's just for a laugh